First Day of School 2015-2016

 

I can't believe this little guy is in 1st grade already!

 

3rd grade? What? When did she get to be big enough to learn cursive?

 

What happened to my little 1st grader? When we got these kids, Raven was in 1st grade. She has 2 years left of elementary and then she will be in junior high!

 

Oh CRAP!!! This is her last year in junior high! Next year she will be a freshman in high school.

 

Nothing else seems to work around here so we should maybe try this.

 



We had an issue with a birth family member this morning that got me all sorts of upset.

When I say that we are done trying to build a relationship with you, please just respect that. I get that it has got to be hard, but there is no need to be so dang disrespectful toward the adoptive parents.

Believe me when I say this, we did not take making that decision lightly. I have been putting myself in your shoes for the past 3 years. I have thought about how I would feel if it were my kids, my niece, nephew or grandkids and I would be devastated if I didn't have contact with them and that is why I have tried to stay in contact with our kids birth family and last weekend was the last straw. I was having a conversation with Barb when all of a sudden Karie got involved. I felt that it was so disrespectful. I have never drug someone else into our conversations or disagreements to tell them off and I expect the same in return. That same weekend, Raven finally opened up to us and told us how she really felt about them and it was then that we sat down and re-evaluated how we wanted to go about this open adoption thing. We decided to ask the kids their opinion because they are old enough to voice that. Not one of them wanted to continue having contact. They said that they want to move on. So we sat down and wrote up a letter asking for the respect and for them to honor the kids wishes and not contact us anymore. That was Monday when I sent the letter in a text.

Fast forward to today. Barb contacted me and I asked her again to respect our boundaries and that set her off. Long story short, I ended up telling her that I would contact the authorities if she contacted us again.

 

So if you are the birth family and reading this, please follow our rules and boundaries if you want to continue having contact with us and the kids. Don't make us have to make this decision again because it is so hard and heart breaking. Do as you say you are going to do. If I text you, please respond. If your phone is shut off, let me know somehow that your phone is shut off. Don't make excuses as to why you are not staying in contact or responding to my text messages. So those of you that we are still in contact with please don't take this wrong, we are just wanting to let you know where we stand on this issue. We love having you as part of our lives as long as it is in the best interest of the kids and the kids are wanting that to happen.

 

Technically, we are not required by law to even allow any type of update or information, so if you want to continue getting those things, please be respectful to us as the kids parents and know that we are the ones running this ship. Having contact is a privilege and I have no problems taking that privilege away if we feel that it would be better for our kids.