I have held onto this for the past couple of days for strength to make it through the rough and dark times.

 

I now know what it meant to go through the honeymoon period with our kids. I honestly thought we were through that a long time ago when the kids started having bad behavior, but the truth is, that was mild compared to what we are going through right now.

I can honestly say we have come to the end of our honeymoon period.

 

I finally broke down and moved one of my crafting desks into the livingroom because I did not like the computer being on my cedar chest and the printer was across the room and not with the computer. When Joe got home, we were able to move the couch down a bit so that we didn't feel like the desk was crowding out the doorway to the kitchen and hallway.

It took me all day to clean the livingroom because I also had laundry to clean up, movies to clean up, mail to go through, and furniture to move. I also had to climb behind the couch in order to plug our power strip into the wall and I got stuck. It took a few minutes for me to figure out how I was going to get myself out of there. I knew I had to get myself out because I didn't have my phone anywhere near me to call for help...LOL...I got myself out without to much effort. It was all good.

 

Since all of our students, besides our own 2 kids called and canceled karate, we decided to have a family night. The kids have all been asking when we could watch the voice that we have had recorded on our DVR since Monday so that is what we did. We have not even finished the first episode yet, but we got a start.

 

My intention was to type up the letter that I wrote to Quynsie, but at the last second, my heart kept saying it was too personal for me to post. We are Mormon and we do believe in the Holly Ghost and I believe that he was telling me not to share it. I tried arguing with the thought and feeling, but I just could not shake it. For whatever reason, I am not supposed to share it.

 

I did talk to Quynsie today about things and let her know that what she is thinking about doing to herself is beyond selfish. I reminded her that her brother and sisters have already lost so much in their life and if they lost her it would devastate them. I asked her if she wanted to be there for them and help them through the tough times, or if she wanted to abandon them just like everyone else in their life has done. Her answer was she wanted to be here for them. I know that she is a strong girl. She even said that when she gets those thoughts in her head, she thinks about her brother and sisters and that is what stops her.

I cannot even imagine our lives without her. She has so much going for her. She is a great student (because she is actually applying herself), she is a great help at home, she loves her siblings more than life itself and she is an amazing daughter, but MOST IMPORTANT, she is daughter of our HEAVENLY FATHER who is very mindful of her and her weaknesses. He loves all of His children no matter what. He is there for us at all times of the day or night. He is our Savior and Redeemer who chose to sacrifice his life for us and our sins/bad choices.